语法有“描写语法”和“规定语法”的分别。描写语法就是对一个语言的使用现状（包括语音、句法、词法等）如实进行描写的研究。而规定语法是对语言进行标准化的语法书。描写语法一般是专业人士对一种语言进行的客观描写，内容可以是五花八门、无奇不有的。既有“好”的东西，也有“不好”的东西，既研究赞美的词句，也研究不堪入耳的词句。而规定语法则是教人们怎么使用“正确”的说法。比如小学课本、新华字典、泰国的皇家词典等等。里面基本上是“正确”的东西，“错误”的东西是没有的。描写语法书是一个语言的原始照片，而规定语法是经过PS（photoshop）过的照片。这两个概念英语里念起来很上口：descriptive grammar : prescriptive grammar，前者为描写语法，后者为规定语法。后者的prescriptive还有“开处方”的意思。你可以猜出这是什么样的语法了。有时候它们是很互相矛盾的。如有些英国语法老教师说 Don't say 'don't'. Say 'do not' （译：别说“别”，应该说“不要”）。他自己都这么说了，语法怎么不对了呢？小学课堂里教的是规定语法，比如，鸟说“一只”，大象说“一头”。但是生活中说“一个”的也很多，虽然这是“错”的。有小学语文课本里曾出现“一只大象”，结果可了不得了，有很多人写信投诉，也有人写文章分析，说“只”只能表示小的动物，如鸟、老鼠等。但也有人写文章说这是可以的，因为在他们的方言里“只”是个通用量词，相当于普通话的“个”。另外，描写语法里经常还是不回避禁忌语的，而普通的规定语法里，包括以之为基础的很多字典里，你是找不到粗口话的，但这并不表示这语言里没有粗口话。有些汉字在字典里找不到的，我们是自己猜出来的。所以一个外国人还是应该通过描写语法著作来了解一个语言的真实面目。

“鸡吃了，人也利索多了。”请问鸡还有吗？

人禽皆平安。鸡不厌食了，养鸡人腿脚也灵便了。

回复：2楼
觉得这样比较好：
这个人有腿病，把鸡吃了就能下地走路了。所以，现在鸡没有了，人病好了。

回复3楼：
哈哈哈哈哈 这位真幽默。

鸡飞了，蛋也打了。去洗头房找特种服务结果被警察突击，小姐跑了，自己被严打了。碉堡了。

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